During our early morning beach stroll to the Argentine Cafe Rob looked back and noted our footsteps, side by side, as far back as we could see...
Rob and I had some very much needed time away in Miami this past month. There was a lot on our minds and our hearts. Too much to even process with words. The quiet company of one another was enough. Major life decisions are presenting themselves daily and it is a challenge to patiently and quietly make each decision without a clear picture of our future. It feels like we are playing tic tack toe at times.
But today I can share just a small glimpse of what our future holds. After months of prayer Rob had decided to enter into Latin American mission work. I say Latin American because he has been a missionary in the lost world of alcoholism, addiction, and mental illness for years. God has given Rob the gift of encouragement through his words and music. He shares his story as a testimony of his experience, torment and joy. His message is unique in that his pain is still very much alive.
Months ago he was asked to participate as nothing more than a gen x representative in a brainstorming session for a mission's organization. Rob was moved by the work being done with the gang members, drug addicts and prostitutes in Latin America. He realized that missionary work was as diverse as his own life experience.
So today we stand in faith following the path our God has set before us.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Catbird99
Check out this amazing new artist! Not only is he incredibly talented but his story is life inspiring. Ok, so I am may be a little impartial but don't let it fool you...it's worth checking out. His music is on iTunes. Get a sample on my blog and then go download the CD.
Robby, with the support of his wife (Yes, the ever planner years ahead ME) took the leap of faith to follow his musical dreams less than six months ago. We had no idea where the journey was taking us but it has awesome- and as a friend of ours would say: "Don't take the word Awesome in vain". It has been inspired by faith, love, compassion and healing.
Robby's music is fueled by his pain and testimony. The way he channels his history, his story is via his music. Our hope is that it would reach others that share in the pain of addiction and trauma. That it would open the hearts of the hurting.
His songs are harrowing and rock driven. But listen carefully and you will find his vulnerability hidden beneath. Catbird 99 is a rare glimpse into the soul of a very private and often mysterious man.
If you notice a hint of Beck/AIR/NIN don't be surprised...both the bass player and drummer played on Rob's album. The making of the album is a wild story in and of itself. It started with a cold call to Agent who almost hung up on the producer, Sean Johnson. But hung on long enough to hear the words Capital Records. A couple days later and a very SCRATCH track mailed, the agent called back saying the talent loved it and was willing to play. Check out the Catbird99 website www.catbird99.com for more on the back story to making the album.
If you want a CD please contact me or you can send an email to OrchidSound Studios at Cara@orchidsound.com
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Studio
Oh to think I don't have any pictures to post...but alas words will have to suffice. We have been so blessed with an incredible temporary studio space for Robby and Orchidsound Studios. It is a beautiful ranch style home built years ago by an original Arizonian cowboy. Steel cow shoes hang from the curtain rods; the rooms are built with wood beams and old candle chandeliers hang amidst the musky smell of dirt and cedar. It is a beautiful home that encourages creativity and freedom. There is space to spare and the grounds are breathtaking.
This Saturday we received an alarming call and we rushed to the Studio. Just a false alarm. Whew...crisis adverted. While I waited the situation out I found myself walking the grounds. Cottontail bunnies galore, a mother quail and her babies, prairie dogs homes and the most impressive of all the wildlife living amidst the music are three delightful hawks. They have made their home in the hundred year old tree on the west corner of the property. As I approached them they watched me intently and flew from branch to branch...almost bragging about their sleek bodies and 10 foot wing span. Oh, to fly like a bird. There is a tranquility, a patience, a straight hunting birds that never ceases to amaze me. But above all they are predators. As we were leaving I noticed they were circling the grounds, no doubt with their most recent pray in site. Their was a bunny skull with left over membrane in the empty fountain- whether it was the coyotes or the hawks who knows but it reminded me of the cycle of life. From ashes to ashes.
The grounds are also filled with indigenous cacti. Prickly pear with fruit blossoms, a yummy cholla and vegetation that looks like it belongs more on the moon than on earth. Owls have made their homes in the Saguaro and hornet nests are on every window seel and column. Dead beatles line the carpets in the home. Live and death everywhere.
What more could an artist dream of than a home filled with history, tradition, musky air, life and death. If this doesn't inspire creativity I don't know what does!
We are blessed.
This Saturday we received an alarming call and we rushed to the Studio. Just a false alarm. Whew...crisis adverted. While I waited the situation out I found myself walking the grounds. Cottontail bunnies galore, a mother quail and her babies, prairie dogs homes and the most impressive of all the wildlife living amidst the music are three delightful hawks. They have made their home in the hundred year old tree on the west corner of the property. As I approached them they watched me intently and flew from branch to branch...almost bragging about their sleek bodies and 10 foot wing span. Oh, to fly like a bird. There is a tranquility, a patience, a straight hunting birds that never ceases to amaze me. But above all they are predators. As we were leaving I noticed they were circling the grounds, no doubt with their most recent pray in site. Their was a bunny skull with left over membrane in the empty fountain- whether it was the coyotes or the hawks who knows but it reminded me of the cycle of life. From ashes to ashes.
The grounds are also filled with indigenous cacti. Prickly pear with fruit blossoms, a yummy cholla and vegetation that looks like it belongs more on the moon than on earth. Owls have made their homes in the Saguaro and hornet nests are on every window seel and column. Dead beatles line the carpets in the home. Live and death everywhere.
What more could an artist dream of than a home filled with history, tradition, musky air, life and death. If this doesn't inspire creativity I don't know what does!
We are blessed.
Monday, August 31, 2009
It is going to be all right
Have you ever looked into someone's eyes seeking just a glimmer of their former self. Fear is captivating. I am overwhelmed by fear tonight. Not righteous fear but instead a momentary lack of faith. Fear based in this world is nothing more than mourning the loss of a dream, expectation, belief system, coping mechanism...you name your vice. Fear is similar to sprinting towards the cliff of the Grand Canyon out of fear of heights...it is non sensical. The pain already exists so why run when the narrow path is illuminated? Because we have yet to see where the paths leads. In our human nature the pain of tumbling down the cliff seems more comforting than the thought of the pain of the unknown. Faith is the conviction in the unseen.
So it doesn't seem such a stretch to someone like myself to sit in sheer panic as I watch my loved ones stare blankly as the world passes by. I say loved ones because this week has been saturated with moments of sorrow with friends, family and sisters and brothers in Christ suffering.
But as my sage mentor has said many of times..."Feel the pain". In feeling our pain we identify the fear and are able to let it pass. Fear can be momentary when you trust in a Higher Power. You are no longer asking for control by controlling your feelings; instead you are experiencing a God given gift: The gift of feeling. Without pain I do not feel joy. For they are one in the same. Serenity; the feeling of peace in spite of the craziness of the world around you. The feeling you have in your Father's/ Mother's arms as the storms blows and lighting fills the skies.
I have developed an affinity for the monsoon season. The balmy air, uncontrollable winds, the blinding dust storms, the often sporadic down pour. This is life. Tonight I sit outside in the midst of the pending monsoon and feel the pain.
I am not sure how long this emotional monsoon will last. I know the Arizona monsoon's usually pass in single evening. Tomorrow can't come soon enough. But for tonight I am called to let the tears pour out. Bring on the monsoon...
So it doesn't seem such a stretch to someone like myself to sit in sheer panic as I watch my loved ones stare blankly as the world passes by. I say loved ones because this week has been saturated with moments of sorrow with friends, family and sisters and brothers in Christ suffering.
But as my sage mentor has said many of times..."Feel the pain". In feeling our pain we identify the fear and are able to let it pass. Fear can be momentary when you trust in a Higher Power. You are no longer asking for control by controlling your feelings; instead you are experiencing a God given gift: The gift of feeling. Without pain I do not feel joy. For they are one in the same. Serenity; the feeling of peace in spite of the craziness of the world around you. The feeling you have in your Father's/ Mother's arms as the storms blows and lighting fills the skies.
I have developed an affinity for the monsoon season. The balmy air, uncontrollable winds, the blinding dust storms, the often sporadic down pour. This is life. Tonight I sit outside in the midst of the pending monsoon and feel the pain.
I am not sure how long this emotional monsoon will last. I know the Arizona monsoon's usually pass in single evening. Tomorrow can't come soon enough. But for tonight I am called to let the tears pour out. Bring on the monsoon...
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Narrative to Previous Post
So I posted a picture of Rob and Sean at the reunion two posts ago stating that I would follow up with a narrative...so here goes!
After over a year of planning the day finally came. Rob was asked to play at a reunion we attend every year. It is not a school reunion but instead a reunion of folks that celebrate their recovery. I look forward every year to the reunion as I just bask in the beauty of Tuscon, the quiet resort we stay at and most of all the quality of time spent with loved ones.
This year had a special twist. Rob was playing his music for the first time live. Over the past year Rob has written and recorded his first album. My brother Sean was his producer, co-writer and friend throughout the process. Rob's album is recovery driven. The album is a journey thru his dark days and expressing as only music can the deep pain he shares with others who have struggled the same. By no way is the music happy or even uplifting in the traditional sense but it is deeply moving and inspiring to those who know his story.
The first portion of the weekend was just beautiful. We had dinner Friday night with the group and then as Rob ran a meeting I spent it under the stars with a dear friend sharing intimate details of life you only would in that setting. Saturday morning I woke up at 5:00 am only to realize the bus to the hike in the Catalina mountains had already left... oh, well it was meant to be. I spent the wee hours of the morning sipping my coffee and watching the sunrise. I read the paper and took some time with Jesus to just celebrate the moment. I have so much to be grateful for. Every day has been a step forward in our marriage and I wanted to take the time to celebrate and rejoice.
We had breakfast on the terrace with friends and attended a meditation workshop that included a little yoga. I was in heaven!!!!! We then took a little nap before my highlight of the weekend...my nieces arrived. We had lunch together and while the boys went to prepare for the performance the following day us girls played and swam in the pool. It is not often that I get that amount of concentrated time with my beautiful nieces. Oh, how I love them. Every bit of them. Their smile, their naughtiness, their hugs and kisses...oh I could go on forever. I believe this is what grandparents talk about when their first grandchild is born. I have the blessing of having four nieces and I just relish my time with each and everyone of them.
After the play date Rob and I attended dinner that evening that included a comedian that nearly caused me to have an accident I was laughing so hard. I even had the opportunity to attend a meeting with Rob after the dinner. But the best was still to come...
We arrived at our room located only one door down from Sean and Cate's to find them snuggling on the lounge chairs in front of the pool enjoying the starry evening. So of course we decided to join in. We stayed up way past bedtime laughing and enjoying the company of family and even more importantly our friends.
Sunday morning came by way too quick. We rushed to the rehab facility and ate a quick breakfast before heading the meeting....so here goes.
Many may not now but the picture on the front of the album is Rob's body map. What is a body map you might ask? Well, if you have ever been to a treatment center you already know but for the rest of us it is a life size contour of a person's body painted in with every injury they have experienced. Rob's is a little overwhelming. Rob started by explaining the body map and then diving right into his testimony. Each song he played was accompanied by the life experience behind it. It was sobering. Not only to the in patients but also the rest of the group. There were tears, sighs, held breaths and just sheer horror on some people's faces. Others nodded because they knew the pain.
The music was painstaking, not because it wasn't performed beautifully, but because the message was deep. When all you want to do is look away and think of pretty things you are reminded of the horror and pain that so many people carry with them every day. But if you are truly listening you will find God in each word and harmony.
There were many tears shed during what is called, the share. I was grateful. Grateful because Sean was able to part of the celebration of the disease that almost took the life of his best friend 5 years ago. Grateful because as the inpatients shared with Rob afterwards, they didn't feel so alone in their struggle. Grateful that music can express what words can't. Grateful to be the wife of man who found his passion, his purpose in life.
So that is my narrative.
After over a year of planning the day finally came. Rob was asked to play at a reunion we attend every year. It is not a school reunion but instead a reunion of folks that celebrate their recovery. I look forward every year to the reunion as I just bask in the beauty of Tuscon, the quiet resort we stay at and most of all the quality of time spent with loved ones.
This year had a special twist. Rob was playing his music for the first time live. Over the past year Rob has written and recorded his first album. My brother Sean was his producer, co-writer and friend throughout the process. Rob's album is recovery driven. The album is a journey thru his dark days and expressing as only music can the deep pain he shares with others who have struggled the same. By no way is the music happy or even uplifting in the traditional sense but it is deeply moving and inspiring to those who know his story.
The first portion of the weekend was just beautiful. We had dinner Friday night with the group and then as Rob ran a meeting I spent it under the stars with a dear friend sharing intimate details of life you only would in that setting. Saturday morning I woke up at 5:00 am only to realize the bus to the hike in the Catalina mountains had already left... oh, well it was meant to be. I spent the wee hours of the morning sipping my coffee and watching the sunrise. I read the paper and took some time with Jesus to just celebrate the moment. I have so much to be grateful for. Every day has been a step forward in our marriage and I wanted to take the time to celebrate and rejoice.
We had breakfast on the terrace with friends and attended a meditation workshop that included a little yoga. I was in heaven!!!!! We then took a little nap before my highlight of the weekend...my nieces arrived. We had lunch together and while the boys went to prepare for the performance the following day us girls played and swam in the pool. It is not often that I get that amount of concentrated time with my beautiful nieces. Oh, how I love them. Every bit of them. Their smile, their naughtiness, their hugs and kisses...oh I could go on forever. I believe this is what grandparents talk about when their first grandchild is born. I have the blessing of having four nieces and I just relish my time with each and everyone of them.
After the play date Rob and I attended dinner that evening that included a comedian that nearly caused me to have an accident I was laughing so hard. I even had the opportunity to attend a meeting with Rob after the dinner. But the best was still to come...
We arrived at our room located only one door down from Sean and Cate's to find them snuggling on the lounge chairs in front of the pool enjoying the starry evening. So of course we decided to join in. We stayed up way past bedtime laughing and enjoying the company of family and even more importantly our friends.
Sunday morning came by way too quick. We rushed to the rehab facility and ate a quick breakfast before heading the meeting....so here goes.
Many may not now but the picture on the front of the album is Rob's body map. What is a body map you might ask? Well, if you have ever been to a treatment center you already know but for the rest of us it is a life size contour of a person's body painted in with every injury they have experienced. Rob's is a little overwhelming. Rob started by explaining the body map and then diving right into his testimony. Each song he played was accompanied by the life experience behind it. It was sobering. Not only to the in patients but also the rest of the group. There were tears, sighs, held breaths and just sheer horror on some people's faces. Others nodded because they knew the pain.
The music was painstaking, not because it wasn't performed beautifully, but because the message was deep. When all you want to do is look away and think of pretty things you are reminded of the horror and pain that so many people carry with them every day. But if you are truly listening you will find God in each word and harmony.
There were many tears shed during what is called, the share. I was grateful. Grateful because Sean was able to part of the celebration of the disease that almost took the life of his best friend 5 years ago. Grateful because as the inpatients shared with Rob afterwards, they didn't feel so alone in their struggle. Grateful that music can express what words can't. Grateful to be the wife of man who found his passion, his purpose in life.
So that is my narrative.
Monday, August 3, 2009
My Heart Smiles
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
The Windy City
So the dogs were packed and ready to spend two weeks with grandma and grandpa, Rob was running late to pick me up and take me to the airport, my sister in tears and my father on his way to Arizona to stay with the in laws. Oh and did I mention that I was late for the airport and hadn't eaten anything all day and it was 1:00 pm...ok so that was my day yesterday. But in spite of the chaos the rest of the day was a blessing. I read an entire novel on the plane (the girly kind you can only get away with buying at an airport), my luggage arrived without any hitches and the hotel is AWESOME! I love whoever designed the W hotels...so trendy, modern and yet in a historical building. I feel like I am in a 1900's sanctuary/church with a disco ball and party music 24/7. Much like the Standard Hotel in LA but without the drug scene and crazy drunk people trying to enter my room at 3 am...story for another day. We had dinner, fish and chips to be exact, and then sought out some solitude by walking the financial district until 1 am. I then relaxed in a scolding hot bath with bubbles (provided by the hotel thank to BLISS) and read all the local sites to see in the beautiful city of Chicago. I fell asleep and woke up at 7 am rested and ready to walk the city again. I found a wonderful little coffee shop next to the train station and only a couple of blocks away. I ate a cheese danish and purchased a travel coffee mug (my green effort for the day). I must have refilled my coffee mug at least 8 times today...ah caffine high! I continued walking the city until it was time to shower and begin the work day. So 15 hours later I am blogging having just finished up a working dinner and feeling inspired...not to work but to play. I wish my hubby was here! I could use his funny charm and exploration skills. I think that if Robby hadn't been a musician he would have been an explorer. It is one of the things I love about my partner...we travel great together. Every moment of every day is filled with excitement and something new. Lounging and relaxing is reserved my annual girls trip. Every other trip includes walking at least 15 miles a day! I love it and I am being serious!
Ok enough ranting and raving about nothing. Oh, except if you can't already tell I love the Windy City!
Ok enough ranting and raving about nothing. Oh, except if you can't already tell I love the Windy City!
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Closer Than A Brother
Our dear brother Travis moved almost two weeks ago with his fiance and stepdaughter to Ohio. Our hearts are pain striken. We miss him so much. He has been a faithful friend and brother to the both of us. He has encouraged, laughed and cried with us throughout it all. His love is undying. He knows what to say in every situation. Of course it usually includes an explative but for some reason it makes your heart smile even in the worst of situations. He sat at the hospital with me a month ago. He was the one person I could lean on. The one person that could bring peace to the situation. He was the only person Rob would allow to see him in his fagile state. His hugs bring comfort and hope. I don't know how he does it but his compassion and understanding is out of this world.
I know the friendship is not over and that he is only a phone call away, only a plane trip away and yet it is not the same. I hurt knowing that my husband longs for his friendship in a way that only a brother can. He is family. He is a brother and a best friend. What a blessing!
Stigma
First and foremost forgive my righteous indignation of a post if you can call it that...
I live with mental illness everyday in my own life, the life of my loved ones, my home and in my work. I read an article this past week that expressed what I have felt since I was a child and for the first time I saw it expressed in words and my heart jumped with excitement and joy. For the first time the medical world is redefining mental health, "being crazy", bi-polar, depressed, RAD, anxious...whatever you call it as a BRAIN DISEASE. This is nothing new. For many years we have known that mental health is caused by an increase/decrease in serotonin, that neurotransmitters connect or disconnect and a myriad of other physical symptoms cause what we know as mental health or what I now will call a brain disease.
I am sick and tired of the stigma. I am sick and tired of people that say just walk away or protect yourself and your children from those suffering. Would you say the same thing if I told you that it was cancer? Would you say just put that person in a hospital ward and leave them to die alone? Would you say that medication is just a band aid? Would you say just let them suffer? Would you blame that person for having cancer? Well, let me be the first to say that a brain disease is no different from cancer. And next time someone tells you they are suffering from a mental illness give them and their family a hug, offer to bring dinner, ask if you can help the same way you would if that person was lying in a cancer ward suffering. Don't feel sorry for them or their family. Don't ask what they did wrong or if they were always that way as a child. Don't assume their family or parents did something wrong. Don't assume God has forsaken them. God has not left their side. God loves them as He love all those suffering from illness...but do you?
I am the first to say that I am embarrassed and ashamed by brain diseases, I wonder if that isn't why I always worked in the mental health field? Was it that God gave me an extra measure of understanding, of love, compassion? And how it is that as a child I could stand outside a room and know the pain going on inside the walls without hearing a word and I condemn, judge and lack love for myself and those around me suffering? Because I am human, I am sinful, I am hurting, I am sick. And if you don't think you have your own sickness then throw the stones, God will be the judge. Again, forgive my anger. I am angry. I am angry that people pray everyday for the starving, for the AIDS stricken, for the physically challenged and never mention a word of those living everyday with a brain illness. And if you don't think it affects you here is statistic for you...one in every three people suffer from a brain disease. Look around you and I ask you if you are the exception?
And don't tell me that it is just a spiritual issue. I myself have gone through this. How many counselors just tell addicts to just pray a little more. And if you didn't already know addiction is also a disease of the brain with the same biological factors at play then any other physical disease. So pray, pray like crazy that God would heal and when He chooses not to please don't imply that God has forsaken that person or that they just didn't accept God's healing. Would you do the same of someone with Cancer?
Today I was reading Sean and Cate's blog. I heard a song by Sara Grove, "It's Going to Be All Right". Well today I believe it is going to be all right. Today I believe that I can live a full and joyous life. I, those I love and those individuals I work with will be alright not in spite of their brain disease but because of their brain disease. God gives all those suffering a measure of strength and courage of the soul that only those in desperation can receive. So don't offer any cliches and don't pretend to understand all the pain but hold onto faith that it is going to be all right. And say, we are going to be all right. Use WE because it communicates that God has not forsaken us but instead has chosen to bless us. Begin to change the world around you by identifying those suffering as blessed and not lost.
So next time you see me give me a hug. Don't ask me to run but know that I am blessed.
I live with mental illness everyday in my own life, the life of my loved ones, my home and in my work. I read an article this past week that expressed what I have felt since I was a child and for the first time I saw it expressed in words and my heart jumped with excitement and joy. For the first time the medical world is redefining mental health, "being crazy", bi-polar, depressed, RAD, anxious...whatever you call it as a BRAIN DISEASE. This is nothing new. For many years we have known that mental health is caused by an increase/decrease in serotonin, that neurotransmitters connect or disconnect and a myriad of other physical symptoms cause what we know as mental health or what I now will call a brain disease.
I am sick and tired of the stigma. I am sick and tired of people that say just walk away or protect yourself and your children from those suffering. Would you say the same thing if I told you that it was cancer? Would you say just put that person in a hospital ward and leave them to die alone? Would you say that medication is just a band aid? Would you say just let them suffer? Would you blame that person for having cancer? Well, let me be the first to say that a brain disease is no different from cancer. And next time someone tells you they are suffering from a mental illness give them and their family a hug, offer to bring dinner, ask if you can help the same way you would if that person was lying in a cancer ward suffering. Don't feel sorry for them or their family. Don't ask what they did wrong or if they were always that way as a child. Don't assume their family or parents did something wrong. Don't assume God has forsaken them. God has not left their side. God loves them as He love all those suffering from illness...but do you?
I am the first to say that I am embarrassed and ashamed by brain diseases, I wonder if that isn't why I always worked in the mental health field? Was it that God gave me an extra measure of understanding, of love, compassion? And how it is that as a child I could stand outside a room and know the pain going on inside the walls without hearing a word and I condemn, judge and lack love for myself and those around me suffering? Because I am human, I am sinful, I am hurting, I am sick. And if you don't think you have your own sickness then throw the stones, God will be the judge. Again, forgive my anger. I am angry. I am angry that people pray everyday for the starving, for the AIDS stricken, for the physically challenged and never mention a word of those living everyday with a brain illness. And if you don't think it affects you here is statistic for you...one in every three people suffer from a brain disease. Look around you and I ask you if you are the exception?
And don't tell me that it is just a spiritual issue. I myself have gone through this. How many counselors just tell addicts to just pray a little more. And if you didn't already know addiction is also a disease of the brain with the same biological factors at play then any other physical disease. So pray, pray like crazy that God would heal and when He chooses not to please don't imply that God has forsaken that person or that they just didn't accept God's healing. Would you do the same of someone with Cancer?
Today I was reading Sean and Cate's blog. I heard a song by Sara Grove, "It's Going to Be All Right". Well today I believe it is going to be all right. Today I believe that I can live a full and joyous life. I, those I love and those individuals I work with will be alright not in spite of their brain disease but because of their brain disease. God gives all those suffering a measure of strength and courage of the soul that only those in desperation can receive. So don't offer any cliches and don't pretend to understand all the pain but hold onto faith that it is going to be all right. And say, we are going to be all right. Use WE because it communicates that God has not forsaken us but instead has chosen to bless us. Begin to change the world around you by identifying those suffering as blessed and not lost.
So next time you see me give me a hug. Don't ask me to run but know that I am blessed.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
New Year
So I have decided to celebrate the fiscal calendar this year and celebrate the month of July as one of new beginnings. I recently took off a week from work for some much needed solitude. A dear girlfriend of mine reminded me of the difference between solitude and isolation. Solitude is time resting in the peace of the Lord. Isolation is loneliness. How often I confuse the two.
The week was spent in fellowship with beautiful women surrounding me in love and encouragement. It came in the form of tearful phone conversations, long chats and on the patio, hugs without words and prayer. It was beautiful.
The idea for time off came from an unexpected source, the HR department of my work. Knowing the many pains and struggles of our lives right now she encouraged me to rest so I could come back to work renewed...and that I did. I have found myself enjoying the every tasks again and companionship of my follow employees. The work I do is inspired by a deep faith that every one of my employees can and will grow into their utmost potential. My job is believe in their professional and personal potential and provide them with tasks that will cause them to grow. Every day at least one staff questions me as to whether they can actually accomplish the new task I have assigned them. I take this opportunity remind them of how far they have come and how far they will go. I love my job.
I also accomplished some organization of the sort while away from work. I was able to clean the house, do laundry and put groceries in the refrigerator. Sounds silly but there was such a sense of accomplishment with each of these very simple yet meaningful tasks. No task is to small when life seems overwhelming...every success must be celebrated.
Because I can't blog without mentioning our two beautiful pups, Philippe and Chloe I will also mention that the week included several play dates at Grandma and Grandpa's house. How they love to see Bryan. I think he is the only other being I have met with the same amount of energy as Chloe monster. They swam together often for hours. Even better was the evening and following day of nothing but sleeping which meant rest for me!
Of course, Philippe naturally leans more towards Uncle Gordon. He is more of a quiet spirit. Uncle Gordon patiently encouraged Philippe to take the big plunge off the first step in the shallow end of the pool to fetch the ball on the other end. I think Gordon must of patiently encouraged Philippe more than 15 times do this. Philippe hesitated almost every time but given the safety of Gordon's teaching spirit he would. All the while of course Chloe is independently jumping off the deep end swimming after Bryan while barking her little tail off. I guess even dogs and humans are not all that different in this aspect...
The week was spent in fellowship with beautiful women surrounding me in love and encouragement. It came in the form of tearful phone conversations, long chats and on the patio, hugs without words and prayer. It was beautiful.
The idea for time off came from an unexpected source, the HR department of my work. Knowing the many pains and struggles of our lives right now she encouraged me to rest so I could come back to work renewed...and that I did. I have found myself enjoying the every tasks again and companionship of my follow employees. The work I do is inspired by a deep faith that every one of my employees can and will grow into their utmost potential. My job is believe in their professional and personal potential and provide them with tasks that will cause them to grow. Every day at least one staff questions me as to whether they can actually accomplish the new task I have assigned them. I take this opportunity remind them of how far they have come and how far they will go. I love my job.
I also accomplished some organization of the sort while away from work. I was able to clean the house, do laundry and put groceries in the refrigerator. Sounds silly but there was such a sense of accomplishment with each of these very simple yet meaningful tasks. No task is to small when life seems overwhelming...every success must be celebrated.
Because I can't blog without mentioning our two beautiful pups, Philippe and Chloe I will also mention that the week included several play dates at Grandma and Grandpa's house. How they love to see Bryan. I think he is the only other being I have met with the same amount of energy as Chloe monster. They swam together often for hours. Even better was the evening and following day of nothing but sleeping which meant rest for me!
Of course, Philippe naturally leans more towards Uncle Gordon. He is more of a quiet spirit. Uncle Gordon patiently encouraged Philippe to take the big plunge off the first step in the shallow end of the pool to fetch the ball on the other end. I think Gordon must of patiently encouraged Philippe more than 15 times do this. Philippe hesitated almost every time but given the safety of Gordon's teaching spirit he would. All the while of course Chloe is independently jumping off the deep end swimming after Bryan while barking her little tail off. I guess even dogs and humans are not all that different in this aspect...
Monday, March 30, 2009
Leap Year
I spent the evening of my 3oth birthday exactly where I wanted to be, in my grandparent's garden surrounded by loved ones. The evening was reminiscent of my 26th birthday. Uncle Gordon had spent many hours and even days...ok maybe even weeks...preparing the garden. It was grandiose! The vibrant flowers were blooming , the smell of wet grass was intoxicating and the garden lights sparkled in the midst of the grape vines. My words can't do it justice. The table was set with china as my grandmother insisted and the salmon was divine. Dessert consisted of ice cream cake and the laughter of nieces brought nothing but pure joy to my heart.
So, why is this blog entitled Leap Year? Well my grandmother in her infinite wisdom decorated the table with frogs in order to honor the leap year. Ok, so I know that per calendar year we may be a little off but for us it is nothing but. Robby and I are walking in faith. At times it feels like we are walking in fear but this is not from the Lord. After over 11 years of Rob working for his father we took the leap of faith to follow a new path. We are unsure where this new path is taking us but we walk in God's grace. Rob has so many talents and dreams and as his wife and best friend I prayed that God would reveal in His perfect timing an opportunity to encourage parts of Rob that had been left dormant. Well, low and behold now is the time.
And what does this have to do with by birthday...well very simple. I am grateful that God allowed me to be 30 before experiencing this. I know that the wisdom I have gained over the past decade has brought me to the place I am today. Of course, I feel defeated and exasperated almost every day but as my dear best friend Shaleen reminds me...it is the eternal perspective that counts.
So, Happy Leap Year for all of you walking out in faith and doing the inexplicable and almost absurd. May God do miracles in you life as in ours.
So, why is this blog entitled Leap Year? Well my grandmother in her infinite wisdom decorated the table with frogs in order to honor the leap year. Ok, so I know that per calendar year we may be a little off but for us it is nothing but. Robby and I are walking in faith. At times it feels like we are walking in fear but this is not from the Lord. After over 11 years of Rob working for his father we took the leap of faith to follow a new path. We are unsure where this new path is taking us but we walk in God's grace. Rob has so many talents and dreams and as his wife and best friend I prayed that God would reveal in His perfect timing an opportunity to encourage parts of Rob that had been left dormant. Well, low and behold now is the time.
And what does this have to do with by birthday...well very simple. I am grateful that God allowed me to be 30 before experiencing this. I know that the wisdom I have gained over the past decade has brought me to the place I am today. Of course, I feel defeated and exasperated almost every day but as my dear best friend Shaleen reminds me...it is the eternal perspective that counts.
So, Happy Leap Year for all of you walking out in faith and doing the inexplicable and almost absurd. May God do miracles in you life as in ours.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
A Growing Family
No pictures yet as I am not ready to post what our home currently looks like. But I can give you a mental picture. Rob's studio currently resides in our hallway and living room. Years worth of musical gear and 4 large boxes of mail to go through are awaiting a permanent home. Dirty dishes are sitting in the sink due to the fact that I haven't yet unloaded the clean ones. A cool purple lava lamp temporarily placed in the bathroom has become my new favorite bath light. Our bedroom pillows are on the couch and our baby blue velvet blanket is partially on the floor. Our refrigerator consists of one carton of milk and some old cheese (Yum!) and yet I am finding solice in the upheaval of it all. Maybe it is all the moves over my lifetime but I am finding myself comforted by the fact that I know the chaos means change. Change is exciting when embraced.
So what is this change you speak of, you might ask...well we are a growing family. OK, so don't get too excited...I am not pregnant. Even better. Stefi is moving in with us. Rob and have been praying since Stefi moved here on growing our family and asking her to be a part of it. I know she is already family but to co-exist in the same home is a little more intimate. To our delight she was ecstatic about the prospect. While things have been challenging to say the least over the past year we couldn't think of a better way to enrich our home than to have our beautiful sister join us on this crazy journey we call life. We have been married almost 4 years and are ready to invite her in.
Last night was her first night here. Because all her furniture is not yet out of storage and the room was not completely emptied till 5 am this morning Rob slept on the couch and Stefi slept with me. The dogs questioned only for a brief moment the visitor in the bed they call home. But Stefi quickly dispelled any hesitation by simply inviting them to come cuddle with her. Little did she know that with these simple words they would immediately jump right on top of her head and make themselves at home. It was beautiful watching my two little pups snuggled right into her as we drifted off to sleep. OK, so there was more chit chat and bathroom visits than sleeping but nevertheless it was comforting. It was a small confirmation that Stefi is meant to be in home. Of course they missed there daddy but it was only for one night.
Amazing changes. God is good!
So what is this change you speak of, you might ask...well we are a growing family. OK, so don't get too excited...I am not pregnant. Even better. Stefi is moving in with us. Rob and have been praying since Stefi moved here on growing our family and asking her to be a part of it. I know she is already family but to co-exist in the same home is a little more intimate. To our delight she was ecstatic about the prospect. While things have been challenging to say the least over the past year we couldn't think of a better way to enrich our home than to have our beautiful sister join us on this crazy journey we call life. We have been married almost 4 years and are ready to invite her in.
Last night was her first night here. Because all her furniture is not yet out of storage and the room was not completely emptied till 5 am this morning Rob slept on the couch and Stefi slept with me. The dogs questioned only for a brief moment the visitor in the bed they call home. But Stefi quickly dispelled any hesitation by simply inviting them to come cuddle with her. Little did she know that with these simple words they would immediately jump right on top of her head and make themselves at home. It was beautiful watching my two little pups snuggled right into her as we drifted off to sleep. OK, so there was more chit chat and bathroom visits than sleeping but nevertheless it was comforting. It was a small confirmation that Stefi is meant to be in home. Of course they missed there daddy but it was only for one night.
Amazing changes. God is good!
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Love
This weekend I was blessed with the opportunity of participating in my sister in Christ's wedding. It was moving to watch two individuals commit themselves to Christ and one another. They came as two and left as one! I am moved by God's love and the blessings he bestows upon us as his children.
Girlfriends
Every year I get the opportunity to spend a beautiful weekend with my girlfriends from college. We have not missed a year since we graduated. It always has always just been us girls and we make sure to leave the boys behind. This year it was Shannon's turn to pick the place and time. She decided to throw herself a big 25 + 5 birthday bash in Palm Springs. You would have to know her to appreciate the magnitude in which she does things. In true Shannon fashion she rented out an original 1960 mod house with shag carpet and all. She demanded we all dress in appropriate attire and play the part (of which none of actually did!). But it was blessed weekend. We cooked, laughed, stayed up till 3:00 in the morning talking and danced.
It is a heavenly gift to have girlfriends such as these. We are all weak in keeping in touch but we have pact that no matter how much time goes by we always pick up where we left off the previous year. We have been by each other sides when it mattered the most, falling in love, weddings, break-ups, job ups and downs and the 25 midlife crisis.
I am thankful for Shannon and Nicole and look forward the baby phase, the retirement phase, and even the dying phase...for surely we will share these moments together.
Cardinals Fans
Rob and I have become true Cardinals fans! How do you know you are a true Cardinal fan? Your weekly grocery shopping trip becomes all about discovering the perfect game food. Your dogs have team jerseys for game day. You fold down the couch/futon in the living room so you can fully lounge while watching the game. The dogs beg to go outside in the sunshine and you don't even notice (not to mention the lovely gifts they leave on the floor). You scream and yell at the players as if you knew them personally. You watch the Christian channel because you see Kurt Warner doing an interview. You high five strangers you don't even know. You wait over an hour just to pull out of the parking lot at the stadium after the game. You cry in your husbands arms while they walk of the field after having lost the Superbowl and all you can think about is maybe next year.
I know this all sounds silly but football has become an unexpected gift in our home. It is one of the only moments in the midst of a crazy week that Rob and I can unwind and not have a care in the world. What are we to do now? Well, we haven't figured that out yet but I am sure we will. So with all that said I am grateful for the silly things in life. I guess maybe it keeps us in balance.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Stefi's 18th Birthday Party
So in true Johnson fashion Stefani rang in her 18th birthday by getting a Toto- A very cool one I might add. We woke up at the crack of dawn and drove to Divinity Tattoo only to arrive an hour early. While we waited we decided to dine with the finest at Denny's.
Stefi's new bathing suite
So now three of the four Johnson's have tattoo's from Divinity Tattoo. Stefi took it like champ. She didn't even wince!
So on another note it was an somewhat painful experience for me. For some reason you always think your baby sister is going to be a baby! But as I sat there I realized the tattoo artist was quite taken by my beautiful sister. He kept dropping hints about his Sunday brunch were all (really meaning only Stefi) are invited. He did wait until I was walking away to finally ask her out. I almost fell to the floor...I mean this guy is older than me! But what can I say, Stefi's beauty knows no bounds and she is all grown up!
That afternoon, relieved to hear that Stefi was not interested in dating this boy, we had a sibling b b que on the roof. Gordon was the chef du jour. We had hot dogs, hamburgers and vegi burgers topped off by an Oreo ice cream cake. We played games and ate candy. I attempted a martineli's toast only to be told I was too lame or maybe they were just too cool for school.
It was a beautiful day and I couldn't think of a more deserving woman than my formerly know baby sister, Nini!
Favorite Christmas Pictures
These girls make my heart smile!
Why do newlyweds always have to be touching each other!
Baby Girls!
A party isn't complete without my Daddy's famous laugh!
A rare public moment caught on camera
Who knew Grandpa loved puzzles!
Christmas Day Dinner
"Mommy, why do you let Daddy do this to me?"
"Thank you for saving me Mommy! Can I repay with a kiss?"
"Mommy, why did Daddy put tape on my hide?"
Daily Cappuccino thanks to our Christmas gift to ourselves
Ada's long awaited birthday party. She looks so sophisticated.
Yummy Smiles
So we took this picture more than 1,000 times. I picked the worst one just for the fun of it!
Grandma Emmons, Grandma Thorne and Stefi at our annual Christmas Party
"Mommy, why are you hugging the weird man in the red suite?"
Good old boy scout fun!
Annual Chaney Christmas Tree decorating Party
Philippe and Chloe enjoying left overs of my first Prime Rib dinner
So a little late I know but I couldn't help but share some of my favorite Christmas pictures.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Morning Cappuccino
So, I am way behind in my blogging as always. I have Christmas to blog, New Years, the Cardinals game, and so much more that eludes me at the moment. But the beauty of the new year has challenged me to take a moment to pause. For reasons unrelated to my motivation I have been blessed with a slow season at work recently. My days have been mostly spent connecting with co-workers and staff and enjoying my quick drive home early in the afternoon. It has been a nice change of pace. And on that note, until Qwest decides to get our computers and phone back up and running at work I get to enjoy some of my day working from home. This includes trying to wake up at 5 to go to Bikram yoga, but instead turning on the snooze button. Finally waking up at 7 am (I am usually to work by this time) and rolling out of bed and crawling to our most fantastic and dummy proof cappuccino machine. If you have never tried the Nespresso machines DO! They are fantastic. They make a perfect cappuccino in less than 2 minutes and your total sum of work is pushing two buttons!
So this morning here I am sitting at my computer, drinking my cappuccino and thankful for the new year and the rest it has brought already. I am blessed.
So this morning here I am sitting at my computer, drinking my cappuccino and thankful for the new year and the rest it has brought already. I am blessed.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
